Libera me
by Mette
Summary: Rin has grown up becoming a young woman, starting to get interested in boys. Sesshoumaru not happy... (Sess/Rin?) [Finished, will NOT be rewritten]
1. Awaken

Yes, I wanted to write something romantic between Sesshoumaru and Rin. Afterall, most us  
Sesshoumaru/Rin fans believe that there will be some attraction between those two when  
Rin grows up. If I get enough happy and constructive reviews, I might add a lemon chapter!  
So please let me know if I should or not! **blushes like mad** Embarrassing... LOL  
  
Disclaimer: Sesshoumaru, Rin and Jaken are copyrighted Rumiko Takahashi, I don't own them.  
Please don't sue.  
  
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Her life so far had been a rather strange one, Rin thought as she trudged through the tall  
grass and trying to keep up the fast pace she was walking in. She was aware of that many  
little girls lost their family everyday and died a horrible death, but in addition to these  
two things Rin had also been given her life back and been the first human who Sesshoumaru,  
the lord of the west, had tolerated, strangely enough. And most people who knew the lord  
would have arched an eyebrow if they knew that he had let her live for a decade now.  
For most knew Sesshoumaru to be a cruel and human-hating youkai who either ignored humans  
when he was in a good mood, or sliced their throats open without blinking when he was having  
a bad day. But for Rin, her Sesshoumaru-sama was just the whitehaired youkai who had given  
her a second chance at living.  
  
She couldn't believe that it had been that long ago really. While she herself had grown  
taller, gained a more womanly form and less rumbunctious, she noticed that Sesshoumaru and  
Jaken, the youkai lord's trusty toad youkai servant, hadn't changed at all. Well,  
except for the fact that Jaken now didn't yell at her for being hyper nor smack her with his  
staff when he was in a fowl mood.  
"Rin."  
Her head jerked up as her sensitive ears caught the barely audible sound of her name.  
By the tone of Sesshoumaru's voice she understood the underlying meaning: keep up.  
So she half ran some more to shorten the distance between them, watching Sesshoumaru's back  
as they moved on. Still after all these years the routines were the same at least.  
Every now and then Sesshoumaru decided to patrol his territory, bringing her and Jaken along.  
Even though it was tireing to have cross great distances like this, Rin liked it, it reminded  
her off the good old days.  
  
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Sesshoumaru's nose caught the scent of humans not too far away. Surely there was a human village  
not too far away, he concluded with a slight frown. When he turned his head to gaze towards the south  
and he saw houses further down in the valley, he snorted in disgust. No matter anyway, he was not intending   
to approach it.  
As the girl finally managed to catch up with him, Sesshoumaru let his eyes move to take a look  
at her. During the last years Rin had grown from a little human pup into a young woman, now reaching  
up to his chest instead and no longer running around his legs. He wasn't quite sure how old she  
was when he had first met her, but he guessed she was around 15-16 summers old.  
her hair was long and wild, big brown eyes full of wonder and her smile still spread warmth whereever   
she went. Her yellow kimono was long, and the woven flower pattern in it wasn't as beautiful as it   
had been the day he had ordered Jaken into getting it for her. But of course, women's clothing wasn't   
meant for travelling either, was it? So maybe this was the reason he had chosen a route this close to  
a human village: Rin needed new garments.  
"Jaken," he ordered in his usual monotone voice, and without turning his head he heard his servant  
run forth, seeing him bow down in the corner of his eye.  
"Sesshoumaru-sama?"  
"Go to the village and aquire some new clothing for Rin."  
Just as Jaken was about to run towards the village, Rin coughed and spoke.  
"Could I go along with Jaken-sama?" she asked, looking up at her lord. In response Sesshoumaru  
merely arched an eyebrow, not having to ask, verbally at least, what her reasons were.  
"Because," Rin added, "the last time Jaken-sama got clothing for me, they.. didn't fit all the  
places..."  
It felt rather strange to have to talk about such things to men, Rin thought. She really wished  
she had more girls her age to talk with, that was another reason she wanted to go to the village.  
Over the years she had barely been allowed to enter human villages due to Sesshoumaru's dislike of  
the villages overall, so he avoided them when possible.  
As he watched her, pondering, Rin stood there, trying to look as cute as possible. She had found that  
begging with words never seemed to work with her master. Maybe it was due to the fact that he spoke  
rather seldom himself, and it had rubbed off on her. But who needed words anyway when Sesshoumaru  
had eyes that clearly conveyed what he wanted them to?  
After a few moments he gave her a barely noticable nod before turning to Jaken.  
"Take Rin with you. I'll expect you back soon."  
With that Sesshoumaru turned and walked towards a tall tree, sitting down calmly without looking at  
them, thereby stating that they were to hurry on their errand.  
Rin smiled, then looked down to the short toad youkai.  
"Come on Jaken-sama! We better hurry!" she said with a smile, finding new energy as she started to run  
down the hill with Jaken at her heels.  
"ACK! WAIT!"  
  
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Villages were so exciting, Rin thought as she walked around the main square, studying all the items  
that were for sale today. Small trinkets, sharp swords and knives, religious objects, lucky charms  
and what she was here for: clothing.  
Jaken followed her with a snort, liking the way the other humans backed away from him. They did right  
in fearing him allright! Now if only the girl could chose some clothing and get it done with!  
Sesshoumaru-sama was without doubt wanting them to be quick about this, and with Rin tagging along  
this would surely take ages! If it had been up to him, he would just have chosen the first and cheapest  
kimono he saw...  
"Jaken-sama, look" Rin said and pointed towards a lovely green kimono, leaning down to yank at his sleeve  
to make sure she got his attention. He was brought out of his thoughts with a yelp, then he saw the kimono.  
"Hah, that one is too expensive!" he said, making Rin arch an eyebrow.  
"It's not like Sesshoumaru-sama needs that much money, and it's quality! I need something that won't  
get ruined easily!" she defended.  
Jaken only grumbled in response, then reluctantly handed her his pouch with money.  
"Thanks, Jaken-sama!" smiled Rin, then turned to the merchant to try the kimono before buying it.  
  
A few minutes later Rin was clad in her new kimono, admiring herself.  
"This one sure is nice!" she said in awe, studying the intricate patterns on the sleeves. Jaken didn't  
seem as impressed, walking infront of her.  
"Whatever, now we have to go back!" he snorted, and Rin's face dropped.  
"Already? But I thought we were going to stay here at least another hour?" she pouted, truly disappointed.  
"Sesshoumaru-sama told us not to be late, Rin!" was Jaken's sour reply.  
"But I want to stay here a little longer, have a look around and get something to eat!" sighed Rin, halting.  
With an annoyed grumble Jaken looked over his shoulder at her, then he sighed.  
"Alright, get yourself some food, look a little, but then we ARE going back!" he declared, pointing his staff  
sternly at her, then turned to continue walking out of the village, not wanting to spend a single  
second there more than necessary.  
Rin had to chuckle, Jaken always acted like this. So with a wide smile she looked around, looking for someplace  
to get some food.  
  
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As Rin walked around, still full from the delicious rice and fish she had bought, couldn't help but notice a   
guywho seemed to taken a interest for her. She wasn't sure, but she thought that he had been looking at her for  
some minutes now while she watched a couple of streetperformers play a song. But still, it wasn't that sure,   
maybe he was just looking past her. Nevertheless, Rin felt bashful at this and quickly turned her face back   
to the performers.  
In not too long however she suddenly felt a hand on her shoulder, and when she turned around in surprise she   
saw the boy standing there, smiling down at her.  
"Hi there," he began hesistantly, removing his hand from her shoulder, suddenly looking just as shy as she was.  
"Uh, hi..." was her nearly silent response as she moved her gaze down to her feet. A boy was talking to her!  
"I haven't seen you around here, are you new to the village?" the boy continued, and Rin nodded.  
"Yes, I'm just passing by," she confirmed, then blinked as the boy nodded towards a log outside one of the huts.  
"Wanna sit down and talk with me?"  
  
After 15 minutes Rin had found the boy to be quite charming. His name was Hatsui, and he had lived in this   
village for almost a year now with his parents and siblings. Listening eagerly Rin nodded once in a while,   
her curiosity slowly getting satisfied. She didn't remember much of her life from her village, and once in   
a while she really enjoyed hearing about others talk about  
their own lives, which made her be aware of slight glimpses from her own past. But the most exciting thing   
was to be with other humans. Most of her time she was just around Sesshoumaru and Jaken, which became very boring.  
Either she had to stick around the tall dog youkai who seldom showed emotions, rarely spoke and he seemed to   
completely ignore her at some times. And then it was Jaken, who ranted and patronized her once in a while.   
But humans... beings like herself! They were so different from what she was used to. And boys too...  
Rin could barely remember the first time she had been aware of herself looking at boys whenever Sesshoumaru   
had chosen routes near human villages. She would trail behind, her eyes fixed intently on human boys and girls   
who played, human boys who teased the girls, human girls who giggled and laughed among themselves;   
and sometimes older human boys and girls kissing.  
Strangely enough she had wanted to try that too, but then she was brought out of her thoughts when   
Sesshoumaru had commanded her to not fall behind, and she ran to catch up with him and Jaken while glancing   
over her shoulder.  
Since then the longing to be around boys her age had grown stronger, and she found herself wondering about   
what it would be like when she got older. Would she get married? Would she have children?  
"So where do you live, Rin?" Hatsui asked, smiling sincerely at her from where he sat, only a few feet away.  
"I mostly travel," was Rin's meek response, not wanting to go into more details that necessary.  
"So you're just passing by, are you?"  
She nodded, blushing a little. Why was she suddenly so conscious of how she looked and how she acted?  
"That's sad to hear... It's hard being new, and I thought you looked nice..."  
Blushing at the compliment Rin blinked, averting her gaze.  
"Oh?"  
Hatsui nodded with a shy smile, feeling himself blushing a tad. as he put his hand ontop of hers, grasping  
it softly. By now her heat was beating like wild, and Rin felt herself wanting to stay.  
"Yes..."  
They sat there for a moment, neither saying anything, then Hatsui looked over at her.  
"Rin?"  
"Hm?" she blinked, jerking her head up to look expectantly at him. The seconds before he opened his mouth  
again seemed as forever, and seemed to stop as his words reached her.  
"Could I kiss you?"  
Her eyes widened a little, and she pondered on that a moment. Before she knew it, she had given him a nod.  
  
Never had anything seemed this slow, Rin thought as she puckered her lips a little, closing her eyes and  
feeling her cheeks nearly burn from all the heat she was feeling as the blood rushed to her face.  
Then it happened: she was kissing a boy. Her first kiss. Butterflies were running amoch in her stomach,  
she felt as is her skin was burning, and she leant closer, deepening the kiss a little. Hatsui in return  
flicked his tongue out, licking her bottom lip as his arms slowly wrapped around her waist, reaching up  
to stroke her black tresses. Then within a few moments Rin had moved her arms around him too, grasping at  
his shoulders and pulling him closer. A minute passed, a hand went a little stray before returning to  
another place people would find appropriate, then Rin felt Hatsui slowly pull back, his eyes searching hers.  
This had been very pleasant indeed, and Rin licked her lips as she moved her gaze down to her feet again.  
"I... I have to go now, Hatsui," she said with a sigh, knowing she had already been there too long and that  
Jaken was indeed waiting for her.  
"You're going to continue travelling tonight? Can't you stay the night?" Hatsui quickly offered,   
sadness in his eyes, but Rin shook her head, giving him a sad smile.  
"I'm sorry... they are waiting for me. But I'll visit if I come here again!" she quickly added, which made  
Hatsui brighten up just a tad.  
"Ok... a pleasure meeting you Rin."  
"Same to you too, bye!" she said and rose to her feet, kissing his cheek in the process. Then she turned and ran  
out towards the forest and to where Jaken was most likely waiting for her.  
  
The light from the setting sun didn't help much as Rin stumbled around outside the village, looking everywhere.  
"Jaken-sama? Are you there? Jaken-sama??"  
For five minutes now she had been staggering to and fro in the dusk without being able to locate Jaken.  
Where had he gone?! Had he abandoned her?  
As she looked behind some tall bushes, she suddenly became aware of a presence behind her, and she turned  
around, finding herself staring right into Sesshoumaru's armoured chest.  
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After waiting for a long while even Sesshoumaru's patience started to wear thin. Sitting underneath a shady tree   
wasn't high on his priority list, less waiting for others. But some of that annoyance was quickly replaced by  
another feeling he couldn't identify (worry?) when he saw Jaken coming up the hill, alone.  
"Where is she?" he commanded, his voice stern as his eyes narrowed slightly. The toad instantly got to his knees,  
bowing low.  
"Rin stayed behind in the village after purchasing new clothing, and this Jaken waited for an hour for her, longer  
than she said she would stay! So Jaken went around looking for her in the village, but..."  
Blinking, Jaken realized that Sesshoumaru was no longer sitting nor listening to him, but instead the whitehaired  
youkai had rosen to his feet and started heading towards the village as the sun's dying light coloured everything  
in a yellow, orange and red glow.  
"Wait here until I return," was Sesshoumaru's command, and Jaken bowed, calling out an affirmative before sitting  
down himself.  
  
He could smell her faintly. Even though she was still in the village, she was coming towards him now.   
Sesshoumaru was leaning onto a tall tree, idly watching the village who was not that far away.  
And yes, in not too long he could see her come towards him, her new kimono flowing around her. But why was Rin  
late? Slightly amused he watched her walking around, searching for something. Upon hearing her calling out for  
Jaken, he decided to end the game now. As silent as only a true youkai could be he made his way through the grass,  
walking up behind her.  
And just as alert as he had taught her to be, Rin's head snapped around, then slowly moved up along with  
her gaze, eyes wide as she realized who had snuck up on her.  
"S-sesshoumaru-sama?" she blinked.  
"You are late," was his stern answer to her unspoken question."  
"I'm so sorry, I forgot the time, and I thought Jaken-sama was waiting here for me!"  
"Jaken is at the hill and waiting for us," Sesshoumaru informed, then he was about to head towards that direction  
as his nose caught a faint scent.  
Was that why she was late? he wondered, his golden eyes narrowing a tad suspiciously.  
Rin couldn't help but blink as she saw Sesshoumaru's eyes moved over her, then met hers.  
"What did you do after Jaken left you?" he demanded, not moving a single musce.  
"Uh, I saw some streetperformers, met some girls who I talked with, looked around at the market and..."  
She was silenced as she saw his gaze harden.  
"And...?"  
"And... I..." she continued, finding she couldn't bear to look into those golden eyes and looked away, "I met a...  
a boy."  
  
So it was true, Sesshoumaru thought with a slight frown upon his face. Rin had seen a human boy. After a quick  
confirm from his nose he knew that nothing really serious had happened, and that made this less worse.  
"What have I told you?" he asked, and Rin licked her lips a little.  
"I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru-sama! I didn't mean to stay this long, and..."  
"Human males are all the same," he interrupted her as he started on the walk back to the hill and the campsite.  
Yes, that was true. It was a wellknown fact that all human males were desperate to mate whenever they had the chance,  
and they would lower themselves to rape any weak female they could find. So from an early age on Sesshoumaru had  
instructed Jaken to tell Rin about how nasty human males were and what they would do if she ever ventured into a  
human village alone.  
Though during the later years he had noticed the girl's increasing interest for the other gender, and he had often  
seen her gazing at boys her age from afar whenever they passed a village. He frowned for himself, his eyes gleaming  
with determination and anger. He would not let a human boy take Rin like that. She was his to own, her life belonged  
to him, ever since he had revived her all those years ago when finding her body dead after the wolves' feast.  
Besides, a human boy would only hit her, boss her around and make her miserable. No, it was without doubt:  
Rin belonged with him.  
He looked over his shoulder, seeing her following after him while looking down at the ground.  
Breaking the silence he spoke up.  
"What did he do to you?"  
  
Upon hearing her master's words Rin looked up, kinda suprised. Then she pulled herself together and answered as  
best as she could.  
"We... talked for a while, held hands and... then he kissed and held me..." she admitted, blushing.  
Not showing any signs that he heard or cared, Sesshoumaru kept on walking. By the tone of her voice he could  
tell that she wasn't discontent with what had happened, and quite frankly it made him... scared?  
From the first year when he had seen her grow up as she travelled with him, he had found himself to be  
as protective over her as if she was his own pup, though he never admitted it to anyone, excusing himself.  
And he found himself becoming even more uptight about who he allowed in her presence as she grew older.  
After her monthly bleedings had started and she turned from a girl to a young woman, he would glare whenever  
he saw males take interest in his Rin. That was one of the reasons he didn't like her going into human villages...  
With her increasing interest for males her age, and her appearance, it wouldn't take long for her to find someone  
who would want her. And human males were...  
Rin blinked as she heard him snarl a tad, walking a little faster to keep up with him.  
"Sesshoumaru-sama...?"  
Realizing he had growled, Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes and avoided her confused gaze.  
"We're going back."  
  
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Chapter one is done! It was hard writing the last part, I hope you like it so far! I have some ideas for the  
later chapters:  
1. This can either turn out into a Sess/Rin lemon, oooooor...  
2. Semi-sad ending, ooooooooooooooooooooooooooor....  
3. Sess/Rin lemon WITH A semi-sad ending!  
  
Please review and tell me what kinda chapters you want! I think I will make this a total of 3 chapters! Now give your  
votes! And let me know if you want a lemon or not... **blushes like mad and shields her face** 


	2. Obsession

Thanks for you reviews! **blushes** Seems like most people want me to write a lemon...   
**takes a deep breath**  
  
Anyway, here's chapter 2! Hope ya like it! **blushes like mad and runs off to hide her face**  
  
Reviwer responses:  
Ano Onna Oji: Thanks for the suggestion!  
Thunk: Your review makes up for fifty others, you are wise! ;) This story will not develop into  
some orgy, the main plot will be the problem wether Rin should stay with humans or not. Though I want  
to add some lime at least to not disappoint the rest of the reviewers.  
Waku-chan: People didn't exactly walk around asking people to bear their children either, did they? LOL But I see  
your point, really! ^_^  
To rest: Thanks! ^_^ For your note, I actually despise happy-wappy Hollywood endings, but I don't like overall tragic ones  
either... So please stop asking me to write a super-happy romantic ending, I think there are lots  
of those out there. I recommend Kuroneko's fanfics if you want happy Sess/Rin lemons ;)  
  
Disclaimer: Sesshoumaru, Rin and Jaken are copyrighted Rumiko Takahashi, I don't own them.  
Please don't sue.  
  
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Sesshoumaru's eyes looked lazily at Rin from across the fire from where he was sitting, leaning  
back into a sturdy rock. How long had it been since she has fallen asleep now and how much time  
had he wasted away staring at her? Not that he needed to sleep, youkai of his status was above that.  
Just... some rest would be nice now and then, and due to Rin's stupid flirting in town he couldn't  
help but wonder.  
Maybe the boy hadn't stopped at kissing? Maybe a worthless human brat had groped his Rin?  
With a frown on his face he tilted his head, the light from the fire flickering on his skin and  
playing among the amber in his eyes. She looked rather peaceful where she slept, maybe because she  
knew that he usually sat awake during the nights. Or maybe because she was a human and didn't know  
better...  
Silently Sesshoumaru rose to his feet, making his way around around the fire and towards the sleeping  
Rin without disturbing her nor Jaken. As he crouched down next to her he couldn't help but feel  
a little sad though. For him a decade or two meant nothing, but for humans it meant everything.  
How he had wished for her to remain as the little girl she had been, a small human doll with soft  
brownish hair, innocent eyes and fresh scent. It wasn't wise to continue on keeping a human for a pet  
like this...  
Though when he saw the look on her sleeping face, he sighed, recalling all those years. This was  
weakness dammit! And he, Sesshoumaru wasn't supposed to be weak! Everyone who had dared imply that  
before wasn't of this world anymore, he had personally seen to that. There would be no doubt:  
He, Sesshoumaru, was above such weakly feelings. His face would remain emotionless, he would  
continue killing those who opposed him, and he would remain as he had been for centuries.  
So why couldn't she...?  
  
All of a sudden Rin murmurred in her sleep, not disturbed though as she simply rolled over, a smile  
on her face. Sesshoumaru froze for a moment incase she woke, then watched as she calmed down, her  
chest rising and falling with her even breathing. Not entirely sure, Sesshoumaru leaned closer,  
sniffing at her. No, he still couldn't smell anything else on her. She still smelled like his Rin,  
of flowers, grass, berries and wilderness. He closed his eyes, leaning a little closer, now sitting only a   
feet away from her. Her scent filled his senses now, and he reached down a nimble hand to stroke some  
strands of dark hair away from her face, feeling the softness of her skin as he did so.  
When he saw that she didn't stirr from the contact, he slowly leaned even closer, their noses nearly  
touching. Why was he doing this?  
Abruptly he pulled back, a frown on his face. This human girl was practically his pup! He had taken her  
in when she should have passed on to the other side, he had saved her, let her stay with him for over a  
decade now. And in addition to that, youkai should never degrade themselves to the level where they  
took interest in humans as mates. And in this care it sickened him even more. His family had enough  
shame on it with the fact of his father's dalliance with Inuyasha's mother. It certainly didn't  
need him to add to the hall of shame by rutting with the human girl he raised!  
With a slight snarl Sesshoumaru sat back on his haunches, watching Rin intently.  
He was probably just feeling possessive. After all, she was his property. He didn't need to show  
off by taking her, certainly not! To think that he almost degraded himself like that, it was absolutely  
preposterous! Narrowing his eyes in a predatory fashion Sesshoumaru nodded for himself. Yes, he was  
above such childish behaviour. Next time a male showed interest in Rin he would merely get rid of them.  
Yes, just like that, it didn't have to be more difficult.  
  
Before he knew it he had lain down next to her, watching her sleep as he propped himself up on one elbow,  
his eyes glued on her peaceful face. She looked more she was when she was younger when she was sleeping...  
Without his stern expression faltering from his face he leaned closer again, then tenderly nuzzled her  
hair, his eyes drifting shut for a moment.  
He would protect her, like he had always done. Protect her until she was able to take care of herself...  
... but when would that time come? or, would he let that time come?  
Usually when human females reached the age that Rin was in now, they got married...  
In the bowels of his chest Sesshoumaru felt a growl rising, but he held it back, opting to clench his  
teeth tight instead. Rin marry? HIS Rin marry? Like there was any human male who was good enough for her!  
Weak human boys who turned into drunk bastards, corrupt leaders or servants with no backbone.  
Carefully he wrapped one arm over her, pulling her closer to him as if to shield her from the outside  
world who would surely harm her like it had done when she had been just a pup.  
If it hadn't been for him she would have died with the knowledge that she was alone... and wasn't that  
what humans feared?  
But still... he didn't want to face his fear either... watching his Rin grow old and die... and if he  
did indeed continue keeping her he would live to see that. After all, it did seem like yesterday  
when she was trumbling around him, chasing colourful butterflies and braiding flowers into her hair.  
Now she was a young woman, and before he knew it she would turn into an old hag, with grey hair,   
an even weaker body and...  
He inhaled her scent again, nuzzling his face further into her hair, sighing as he calmed down again.  
Why did she always make him upset like this...? Not many beings were able to thin his patience like this.  
And why was Rin the only human...?  
Feeling her stirr a tad, he froze for a second, listening to her deep breathing and the wind blowing through  
the trees, making the leaves dance in the moonlight.  
Then finally, with a mental sigh Sesshoumaru pushed himself up and away from Rin, his golden eyes not  
leaving her though. Rising to his feet he brushed his haori free from grass, reprimanding himself.  
The lord of the western lands wasn't concerned with the fate of lesser beings. He shouldn't care wether  
they breathed or not as long as they didn't oppose him.  
He didn't care that Rin was... going to leave him.  
Silently he crouched down next to her again, then leaned close, placing a small kiss on her forehead.  
He let his lips linger for a moment, tasting her skin, then once again rose to his feet, turning to sit down  
at the other end of the fire again, deep in thought still and trying to make a final desicion.  
  
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A/N: What will happen? Review and tell me to write more ;) 


	3. Observation

Gah, fanfiction.net was down the day I thought about posting this chapter, but since it was down it  
got a little longer and got a little better in my opinion ;) I always find things that I can do better  
LOL  
  
Reviewer comments:  
  
Disclaimer: Sesshoumaru, Rin and Jaken are copyrighted Rumiko Takahashi, I don't own them.  
Please don't sue.  
  
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Sunlight awoke Rin the next morning, and tiredly she yawned, stretching her limbs and pushing the blanket  
away as she did so. When she rubbed her tired eyes she noticed that Jaken was busy roasting a fish over the  
re-newed fire, not paying much attention to her. Some distance away, eyeing the forest, stood Sesshoumaru.  
Another usual morning, Rin thought.   
"Morning, Jaken-sama," she said with a slight yawn, running her slim fingers through her hair to untangle  
some of it.  
The toad youkai grumbled back in response, seemingly more interested in getting the fish prepared for her,  
she thought, then looked over to Sesshoumaru. He was still standing there, most likely he was trying to  
decide today's route. Getting to her feet, she began to walk over to him.  
"Morning, Sesshoumaru-sama!" she greeted, earning a nod. Which meant he probably wasn't angry at her any  
longer, otherwise he would have simply ignored her she thought. This was 'normal' for him.  
"Your breakfast should be done soon," he said in his usual non-chalant matter, his eyes slowly  
moving over the landscape infront of him, then they glanced at Rin once before returning.  
She nodded, standing by his side for a while, occasionally glancing back at Jaken.  
"I will go somewhere dangerous today, so you ought to stay near the village," Sesshoumaru suddenly said,  
and Rin blinked curiously up at him.  
"Sesshoumaru-sama...?"  
"Most likely I'll be back at nightfall."  
Accepting that, Rin nodded, then blinked as she heard Jaken call out to her that breakfast was ready  
and that he would toss it away if she didn't come quickly. Chuckling a bit the girl turned, running back  
to the fireplace and not noticing the ways the youkai lord's eyes softened a bit.  
  
After finishing her breakfast Rin went down to the river to get herself cleaned, splashing the cold water  
into her face. She wondered where Sesshoumaru was going today, but she didn't think too much of it,  
whenever the youkai lord was going to fight he always left her behind, and he always came back to her when  
he was done.  
But what was on her mind most was that she was going to stay at the village! Which meant that she could  
see Hatsui again! Blushing a little Rin looked at her reflection in the water, remembering the last evening's  
events. He had kissed her... the first boy who had kissed her... Maybe he would kiss her again today?  
That thought made her stomach tingle, and she giggled a little as she got to her feet, picking some flowers  
on her way back.  
  
At least some things hadn't changed, Sesshoumaru thought bitterly as he saw Rin walking up to him and Jaken,  
who was busy strapping things on Ah-Un, the large packbeast. Rin would always pick flowers he guessed...  
It was fitting for her.  
"Rin, we are going now," Sesshoumaru said non-chalantly, giving her a glance before turning to make his  
way toward the forest.  
"Ok, be careful!" responded Rin, looking up at him as she ran over, leaning up to tie a flower to his armour.  
Arching an eyebrow, Sesshoumaru arched an eyebrow at the blue flower which certainly did... stand out against  
his otherwise fearsome appearance (at least according to himself). To his own surprise he merely walked on,  
letting the flower stay on his armour for now, at least until Rin was out of sight. He gave her a nod, then  
continued on towards the forest through the tall grass, Jaken stumbling after him while yanking at Ah-Un's  
leash.  
Standing there for a moment, Rin waved to them before looking over her shoulder. Another whole day in the  
village... with Hatsui. With that she began running, hugging the flowers close.  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
"Hatsui!"  
Looking up from the ground Hatsui wiped his sweaty brow, eyes squinched as he tried to make out the form that  
was running towards him from the south, the bright sun cast directly into his eyes.  
"Rin..?" he blinked, then his lips widened in a smile, "I thought you were going travelling?"  
Rin reached him, smiling widely as he rested his dirty showel over his shoulders.  
"I'll be staying another day, so I thought I'd come to see you!" she said, blushing at the end upon remembering  
the kiss last night. In response to that Hatsui smiled even more.  
"Great! Dinner will be ready soon, I just got to finish up plowing some here."  
"Want me to help you?" Rin offered meakly, and he nodded gratefully back at her.  
"Sure, you could move the rocks?"  
Rin nodded, crouching down to start on the work.  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
Like the predator he was, Sesshoumaru watched the two young humans intently, standing still inbetween the trees  
and concealed in the darkness of their shadows.   
After reaching the forest he had dismissed Jaken, telling him to go bother someone else or face his wrath, and of course  
the toad youkai hadn't ignored that order, scuttering off on his short legs. With that Sesshoumaru headed in the direction  
of the village, sniffing the air and soon finding Rin's scent, then only pleasant one among all the human  
stench in the area.  
When he stood there outside the field, he had to snort as he saw the human boy Rin was busy chattering with, picking up   
small rocks while he was busy plowing.  
Was that really the boy Rin had been with last night?  
He looked scrawny, but at least he seemed to be good at doing servant work... fitting for a human.   
Snorting, Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes. Would that really do? Would that boy be able to take care of her?  
He would have to wait and see. So Sesshoumaru kept still, eyes glued on the boy, not able to hide the malice in them though.  
Yes, he would wait... ready to interfere if needed... ready... to kill the human boy if he harmed her.  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
After a healthy meal Rin and Hatsui were sitting on one of the fields not too far from where he lived.  
Lazy from the meal, both just sat there, enjoying the nice weather and just soaked in the calm atmosphere and  
the sunshine.  
"Your mom makes really good food," Rin sighed contently, leaning back a little on her elbows, watching the clouds.  
Hatsui smiled and nodded.  
"I know, she's really good at it... I'm sure she can teach you some things if you want to?"  
"I would love to! I could really need some cooking lessons," giggled Rin, thinking of all the times she had  
to find berries on her own, or catch fish in the river along with Jaken. For a long time she had to eat the same  
things again and again, badly prepared. It would be nice to be able to show Jaken that she was indeed good for  
something!  
"Then you could help her with the dinner maybe?" Hatsui said, stretching out with a slight yawn.  
"Yeah, I guess so," was her reply, watching him with a smile. Though he seemed rather shy and timid, he was really  
a nice guy. Maybe not super handsome like some of the other boys she had seen, but there was something special  
about him...  
Silence reigned for a few minutes, and both sat there in peace.  
  
Rin blinked as she felt his hand move to cover hers, and she turned her head to give him a surprised look.  
He smiled back at her, a slight blush covering his cheeks as he scooted a little closer.  
"Umm, do you... think we could kiss again?" he asked, his eyes searching hers. Slightly dumbfounded Rin  
watched him for a second, then she nodded and edged closer to him, feeling that nervous feeling enter her  
stomach again. Both seemed to hesitate for a moment, eyes locked as the distance between them slowly decreased,  
until lips met lips. Blushing even more Rin closed her eyes, glad that she was already sitting on the ground.  
Her limbs seemed to quiver a little, was it because she was afraid of this? She didn't quite know, but for now  
this was quite nice...  
Her hands moved up to rest against his chest, gripping the material of his shirt lightly. In return she felt his  
hands slide carefully down her arms, then moving to the small of her back before his arms wrapped themselves  
carefully around her waist. After a few minutes their lips parted, and Rin's eyes fluttered open, staring  
right into his grey ones. Neither said a word as they regarded eachother, then Rin leaned slightly up,  
shyly kissing him again, but not feeling as uncomfortable on this new territory.  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
It took alot of his willpower to just sit there, and Sesshoumaru found himself to be quite sceptic to the  
scene that was unfolding infront of him. The hour they hadn't been outside where he could see them had made him  
surprisingly agitated, but he had calmed down after finding them back on one of the fields. That was, until  
the human boy had kissed her. And it didn't seem like Rin was protesting either, by the looks of it.  
Lowering his head like a stalking lion the youkai lord snarled a little for himself. Human courtship.  
How distasteful.   
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
  
Upon feeling one of Hatsui's hands sneak up towards her breast, Rin's eyes went wide and she abruptly broke the kiss,  
pulling back and looked at him with big and slightly troubled eyes.  
"Hatsui... I... think we should keep to kissing for now... I... don't know you that well yet," she explained with  
a blush colouring her cheeks when she saw his confused, if not disappointed look. But he nodded, smiling a tad  
and glanced away.  
"I... I'm sorry Rin, I... accept that."  
Feeling better at hearing that Rin smiled too, then moved closer again, leaning her head onto his shoulder and  
wrapped her small arms around his waist.  
"Thank you."  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
Wanting to snarl and seriously injure the human boy for even daring to grope Rin, Sesshoumaru's fists clenched and  
threatened to break through the skin of his palms. So it was a sudden, but pleasantly surprise when he saw that  
the human boy actually let Rin stop him in his way too daring adventure. His demeanor cooled, and he allowed himself  
to relax just a little as the two human teenagers merely hugged eachother. That was ok... at least they had stopped  
kissing.  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
A/N: Okay, another chapter done! Please review it so I can get some suggestions or comments so I can rewrite  
chapter 4 before I post it! (Some of the next parts are done, inclduing the last part of the ending chapter) 


	4. Warmth

Reviewer responses:  
  
Discord: Gah, I can't believe people actually think my way of writing Sesshoumaru is the   
best on ff.net!! **blushes like mad** You have no idea how happy that makes me!! ^_^   
It really inspires me to write more! Easier to write him like this than in "Playful passtime"...   
**chuckles** THANK YOU!!! ^_^  
Lafine: Kill Hatsui?! O.o **blinkblinks, then yanks at Sesshoumaru's leash** HEEL! LOL  
AngelsExist: Believe me, I had a hard time deciding that myself!! ;)  
Just peachy: Well, Hatsui is a shy kid and doesn't have a high self-esteem! So he wasnted  
to ask Rin first!  
C Queen: I'll keep on writing yeah, and as for Fluffy... wait until next chapter ;)  
Ishi: Thanks for the constructive criticism, I'll rewrite Rin a little. But disobedience...?  
I seriously don't think Rin would dare disobey him THAT much! **chuckles**  
Martina: **nods** Yups, angsty Sesshoumaru coming up! As for the lemon, I'll post it by itself!  
Misao CG: No, it's latin ;)  
To the rest: Thanks! ^_^ **blushes upon the lemon requests**  
  
  
Disclaimer: Rin and Sesshoumaru belong to Rumiko Takahashi, please don't sue! Hatsui is a character made by  
me, but only for this fic.  
--------------------------------------------------  
  
Rin's memories of cooking had been dormant for many years now, but if she tried to she could barely remember  
her mom making food, asking for her help for the easiest parts. So it felt a little weird to stand there and  
help Hatsui's mom with making dinner. His mother was a short and well built, neither skinny nor fat.  
She wasn't exactly beautiful, but her eyes and smile shined, speaking of a good natured soul.  
"It's getting late..." Hatsui's younger sister, Ashita commented as she looked out of the door, then resumed  
peeling her vegetables. The girl seemed to be 8 years oldw with slightly curly hair framing her freckled face,   
a thin body but showing strength for her age, and she seemed to be pretty trained in helping her mother around   
the kitchen, as Rin herself had used to...  
"The men will be back soon enough," chided the mother, then turned to Rin with a smile, "could you check if  
the rice is boiled, Rin-chan?"  
Will do!" Rin nodded, shook out of her memories of a past long ago. When she did check, she could  
confirm that the rice was indeed ready.  
"It's ready!"  
"Good!"  
And soon, not too long after the three had finished setting the table in the small kitchen, did the  
men arrive back from the fields after working for several hours.  
"Mmmm, it smells good dear!" Hatsui's father smiled gently at his wife, kissing her cheek affectionately  
as he passed by her and sat down at the end of the table, followed by Hatsui and his younger brother.  
The father had his hair tied in the usual hair knot, and a beard on his face. He looked like he could  
lift heavy loads, fit and slightly muscular, which probably was a result of working on the fields  
all day, everyday. As for Hatsui's brother, he looked very much like his elder brother: both  
were of middle height, dark straight hair which was cut short, grey eyes and middle built and soft  
facial features.  
"It's ready, so let's sit down and have a nice meal, I'm sure you're famished after...  
Ashita, don't start filling your bowl before the guest! It's rude," started Hatsui's mother, giving the  
young girl a pointed look, and the daughter immediately pulled back as she was about to fill her bowl with  
rice.  
Rin had to smile for herself. This was also something she had remembered: a family. Even though Sesshoumaru  
made sure she got fed, had proper clothing and gave her an occasional smile now and then, this was different.  
They ate together everyday, laughed and screamed at eachother, had quarrels and supported eachother...  
She had to admit, she liked it better when Jaken was shouting at her than ignoring her... For if he ignored her,  
she didn't have anybody to talk with. Sure, she could always run up next to Sesshoumaru as they walked,  
but over a long time a one-way conversation like that became frustrating, to say at least.  
She didn't have numbers for all the times she had wished she could talk with him about everything, and he would  
respond. If only with a few words, some nods and counteropinions now and then.  
But instead he always sported an emotionless mask... and she couldn't figure out why.  
  
After filling her bowl Rin picked up her chopsticks, then waited for the others to get their bowls filled too.  
"So, you helped mother with the food Rin?" Hatsui asked and looked over at her. She nodded and smiled sheepishly,  
pausing in the eating.  
"Yes, though I can't say I was that much of a good help..."  
"Nonsense Rin-chan," smiled his mother, waving a hand, "you just need some more pratice, and then you'll  
see you'll make a great cook for your future husband!"  
"Speaking of husband, do you have anyone yet?" interrupted Hatsui's father, chuckling upon seeing Hatsui blush.  
"Uh, no, I don't," Rin admitted, feeling shy, "I'm travelling with my caretaker, and we seldom stay long  
at the same place..."  
"Hm, that's sad to hear," the mother noted, "at least it's nice having you as our guest. Feel free to come and  
visit if you come by these parts again."  
Not failing to see the obvious suggestion, Rin felt her cheecks flush, and upon raising her gaze alittle to look  
at Hatsui, she noticed that he had also understood the lying meaning. Though... it didn't sound that bad,  
she thought. Not that she would have the opportunity though.  
  
-------------------------------------------------  
  
"I m-must apologize for my parents earlier tonight," Hatsui half stuttered forth, not daring to meet Rin's eyes  
as he walked down the hallway to show Rin where she was going to stay for the night.  
It was past sunset, and Sesshoumaru still hadn't shown up, so she had kindly accepted their offer of staying  
there for the night.  
"No, it's ok," assured Rin, watching his back as they walked. If it hadn't been for the fact that she wouldn't  
stay here for long, she would have at least considered that option: staying with Hatsui. So maybe she had met  
him only one day ago, but so far he seemed like a really nice guy, just a tad shy and timid.  
And she liked him, she really did. And it did seem that his feelings were mutual. Also, his family was nice and  
she felt at home here. But...  
"If you need anything, just ask me, I'll be sleeping in the room next to yours."  
Noticing that they had stopped by a door, Rin blinked and looked up at him, putting on a smile for his sake.  
"Thanks Hatsui, I really appreciate it..." she said, but he shook it off, smiling shyly at her.  
"It's ok Rin, think nothing of it... I... just wish you could stay here longer, or at least visit us again...  
I will miss you," admitted Hatsui, his eyes moving down to the floor.  
Rin's smile turned slightly sad, and she nodded.  
"I feel the same... I... I've just met you, but... I like you... alot."  
After the words had left her mouth Rin blushed furiously. Had she just admitted that she liked a boy?  
To her relief she saw him smile back sincerely at her.  
"I... really like you too, Rin," he whispered, then leaned forward and searched her eyes for a moment, and  
when he found no fear nor disagreement in them, he closed the distance between them and kissed her  
carefully.  
  
They stood there for a few minutes, both paying no attention to time and space until they broke the kiss,  
watching eachother, both slightly timid and giddy from the kiss.  
"Sleep well Rin, I'll see you tomorrow," Hatsui finally said, giving her a smile before turning to enter his  
room.  
"Good night," nodded Rin and smiled, sliding the doors open and stepping into the small room.  
  
-------------------------------------------------  
  
The moon was on his side tonight, Sesshoumaru thought as he silently ran through the grass towards the group of   
houses in the part of the village where Rin was staying. It was light enough for his youkai eyes to make his way   
through the forest, but dark enough to conceal him from the prying eyes of the guards that were placed around.  
It was simple for someone with his skills to sneak into a village like this undetected.  
With a quick sprint he finally reached the first hut, and he froze, his ears perked up and listening for  
any sounds that did not belong with the night to begin with. When he heard none he sniffed the air carefully  
before contiuning stalking towards the houses where he could smell her.  
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
A/N: Another chapter done! Please review and make me happy! Thanks for all your wonderful reviews and suggestions!!  
  
Anyway, next chapter will come in two versions: first a non-lemony chapter, then I will write it in a lemon  
version later! Don't know when though ;) 


	5. Ponder

This chapter inspired by the song "Forever not yours" by A-Ha. I found the lyrics very approriate for the rest of  
the fic. Download that song, it's beautiful!  
  
Disclaimer: Rin and Sesshoumaru belong to Rumiko Takahashi, please don't sue!  
  
Responses to reviews:  
Ayame-fataru: Thanks! **blushes** Ego? Yes, I do say his ego is under alot of strain here, which  
is why he does as he does... **grins and points further down on this page**  
Ano Onna Oji: As the sun rose over the forest, Sesshoumaru watched the forest, deep in thought.  
What was he going to do? What would Rin like? And what would Jaken want? Wait, Jaken's opinion didn't matter...  
As he heard some yawning beside him, the youkai lord looked over his shoulder to see Rin awake.  
"Morning Rin-darling! I couldn't decide if I was going to go for scrambled eggs or fruit salad, so I made both!" Sesshoumaru  
smiled brightly and held up the spit which a now rather fried Hatsui was impaled on.  
"Juice?" the cheery youkai asked the dumbfounded Rin as he aquired a bottle of lemon juice from the pocket of his frilly,  
pink apron... DARN!! Now I wanna draw that!! :D **snickers like mad**  
Dark flame: Thankyou! ^_^ I've tried creating my own style of writing, and it seems I'm getting the hang of it!  
foureyedbookworm: Wait until I finish, then you'll see! ;) **smirks** And the lemon will be up next week I think, I think  
it will take me some time to finish it... **blushes like mad**  
Chiharu: I started writing the middle parts and the last parts right after chapter one, then writing the inbetweens ;)  
Kako: I know, it's difficult to write Sesshoumaru good, and I'm really happy you think I'm keeping him in character! :D  
  
--------------------------------------------------  
  
The doors slid open almost soundlessly, and Sesshoumaru slinked inside, shutting it as his eyes travelled the room.  
His nose had been right: there, in the other end of the small room he could see Rin sleeping peacefully,  
snuggled up in her futon with the usual peaceful look on her face. Her breathing was even, she smelled clean,  
she was unharmed.  
Watching her sleep made him calm down a little. She was safe...   
  
Thoughts whirled around in his head as he walked over silently, then crouched down next to her, his eyes travelling  
up and down her small body.  
What should he do? Before he entered the house he was quite certain, but upon seeing her sleep again  
all the images he had forced away came back. Rin when he had first seen her... a beat up Rin who  
smiled brightly at him while lacking a tooh... Rin lying dead on the road... Rin opening her eyes again...  
Feeling the familiar wave of possesiveness, Sesshoumaru's eyes softened a tad as he reached his hand out towards  
her, holding his breath as the few seconds it took before he touched her hair seemed like an eternity.  
Her hair felt softer than he remembered it to be as his fingerpads stroked her brown hair gently, not wanting  
to wake her up.  
  
Could he do this? Was it really wise to leave her here with that human boy? He had respected her wishes so far  
for distance, which at least showed that he cared about her at least. If the human boy instead had tried to force   
himself on her then, Sesshoumaru knew he would have killed him on the spot, without doubt nor regret.  
If Rin had cried, he would have put on his icy mask and told her to follow him.  
.... why couldn't that had happened instead? It would have made things so much easier...  
But he could still do it, right? After sniffing the air, Sesshoumaru concluded that the boy slept in the next room.  
It would be an easy task to just slink out into the hallway and the room, then with a swift swing of his  
poisonous claws the boy would no longer be among the living. Or, just to make himself feel better, Sesshoumaru  
could wake the worthless human up just to enjoy his fear before he killed him.  
Then nothing could stop him from grabbing Rin and disappear into the night where he had come from, and the next  
morning everything would be back to normal, just like it had been and should be.  
Away from this pathetic village and the absolutely distasteful scent of that human boy...  
  
Leaning more over the sleeping girl, Sesshoumaru sniffed at her, her soft scent filling his nose.  
To believe that he had thought of it as foul all those years ago.  
How was it possible for a mere human girl to make him so weak? It angered him greatly, yet... how could he  
be mad at her? His little Rin?  
How could he kill somebody she obviously cared about? Could he kill somebody who cared for her in return?  
Realizing he was now leaning even closer to her, he sighed, closing his eyes as he nuzzled her cheek gently,  
not knowing what to do.  
  
---------------------------------------  
  
Something was tickling her, and Rin wrinkled her nose in her sleep, her tired eyes fluttering open.  
Nothing could have prepared her for the sight of Sesshoumaru leaning over her, his eyes closed as he  
gently nuzzled her cheek.  
"... S-sesshoumaru-sama?" she croaked out, shifting and pushing herself up. The dark form above her pulled  
away slightly, and a wave of relief washed over her as she saw a pair of familiar golden eyes open  
and stare back at her.  
  
Startled a little, Sesshoumaru pulled back from her, his eyes gazing at her in the darkness of the room.  
"Why are you late...?"  
He almost smiled bitterly at that. No questioning of why he was here in the room in the middle of the night?  
This he hadn't planned. What should he do? What should he say? Should he say anything at all?  
"Are you okay, Rin?"  
The words had left his mouth before he became aware of it.  
Relaxing a tad after hearing her master's voice, Rin laid back down, watching him with a tired smile.  
"I'm fine, Hatsui's family is very nice..."  
So that was the name of that accursed human boy. He hated it.  
"I see."  
"His mother taught me how to make some rice dishes, and they said that I could come visit whenever we travel  
by this village again," continued Rin in a hushed whisper, not wanting the sleeping inhabitants wake up.  
She could barely hear herself, but to Sesshoumaru's delicate youkai ears it was more than loud enough  
to make out the words.  
"So they liked you, I gather?" he responded calmly, sitting himself down next to her futon, his taunt muscles  
relaxing a little.  
Smiling widely, Rin nodded and stared up at the ceiling. She couldn't remember the last time Sesshoumaru  
had actually asked her questions. Hell, she could barely remember the last time he had a conversation like  
this with her. Mostly it was only orders for her to get food, hurry up or to stay put until he returned  
from a battle or anything of that sort.  
"Yeah, it seems so..." she admitted, then blushed a little, which earned Sesshoumaru's curiousity.  
"Is something the matter...?" demanded the youkai as he leaned slightly closer, not liking the way the girl  
averted her eyes.  
Rin couldn't exactly find the right words for what she wanted to express, or more correctly, did she really want  
to let Sesshoumaru know that Hatsui's father directly had suggested that she should stay and become  
Hatsui's wife? How would he react? Knowing all too well of Sesshoumaru's great anger and distaste towards humans  
in general, Rin couldn't imagine how he would react that they wanted her to stay.  
"N-no, it's nothing..." sighed Rin, letting her eyes travel across the thin wall.  
Feeling a little frustrated, Sesshoumaru growled a little, narrowing his eyes. Something was indeed wrong,  
and he wanted to know what.  
"Tell me, Rin."  
The seconds before Rin finally opened her dry mouth to answer felt like forever for both of them, then  
Rin spoke out as best as she could.  
"T-they... they wished I could say..."  
  
There were no words to describe what those words felt like. Even though he had heard her say 'they', indicating  
the family, Sesshoumaru could sense that they also refered to her... Rin wanted to stay with these humans?  
So it was like he had feared... wait? Feared? He didn't fear anything! If Rin wished to leave him, then she  
should leave. She was of no use to him, she had never been nor would she be. The only thing she did was  
delay him, jabber about uninteresting stuff, for example the weather, pathetic flowers she picked and about  
trivial stuff, she constantly needed food, water and to rest.  
Well, okay... so she did keep Jaken busy so the two of them were arguing so he at least would have some peace,  
and she took amazingly good care of Ah-Un. And once in a while she groomed his hair too... and she had become  
rather good at fixing clothes, which was women's work.  
Then it was... her presence... she... whenever she smiled up at him, it made him... calm down.  
He didn't know why or how, but it did. All he knew now was that he couldn't chose: her happyness, or his?  
Then it hit him.  
He was a mighty youkai, the lord of the western lands. His will was final, he owned this human girl since the  
moment her heart had started beating after he had revived her! She adored him!  
Nobdy could take her without his permission... so he would make her return to him, where she belonged.  
  
As Rin saw him lean closer, his form looming over her in the dark she couldn't help but squeak a tad, her eyes  
growing wide.  
"Sesshou..maru-sama?"  
She was silenced however as his lips gently brushed against her cheek, his soft breath tickling against her skin.  
Reaching one arm out he pulled her close and laid down next to her, hugging her back into his chest, her small  
form slightly covered by his bigger one.  
Not moving, Rin stared right in front of her, feeling his arms gently wrap around her waist and his nose burrying  
into her hair. Why was she blushing?  
When she usually slept, she slept next to him, only snuggling up in his tail. And when Sesshoumaru slept, which  
wasn't often at all, he chose to sit underneath a tree, sleeping lightly incase any danger lurked.  
This... felt weird. To hear him breathing calmly into her ear, one hand at her waist, his strong arms pulling  
her close, the warmth of him next to her.  
After a few moments Rin allowed herself to breathe again, then she closed her eyes and leaned back into his broad  
chest, nuzzling her face into the softness of the tail.  
  
When she relaxed against him, Sesshoumaru sighed, lazily stroking his cheek against her shoulder, where the hem  
of her sleeping kimono had fallen down, revealing some skin. Gently stroking his lips over her collarbone and  
nipping with his teeth to distract her, he moved his right hand down from her waist to her thigh, which made  
Rin freeze.  
"... what are..." she began, sounding both confused and a little scared at the same time.  
"Shhh," hushed Sesshoumaru as his other hand found her chin, pushing her face towards his, "don't speak...  
not now..."  
  
------------------------------------------------  
  
A/N: Lemon part of this chapter will be posted later when I actually finish writing it! **blushes**  
Anyway, hope you anti-lemon people liked this chapter, and I hope you lemon-lovers will look forward to the  
lemon part! Anyway, review with suggestions for improvements, your thoughts, fears and hope!  
  
The next chapter, and altso the last chapter, is done! I'll post it when I think I've gotten enough reviews! ^_^  
**smirks** Yes, I love getting reviews! 


	6. Desicions

Written by: Mette Krangnes  
e-mail: xelloss@online.no  
  
Here it is, the last chapter! Finally you will know how this ends, buckle up!  
  
Reviewer responses:  
Arucard: Lemon? Soooooon ;)  
Chiharu: You want me to write even MORE...? **blinkblinks**  
Ishi: **smirks** Heeheeee  
AngelsExist: Patience!  
C.Queen: Now don't bother reading this and read further down if you're so excited about  
knowing how this ends, huh? ;)  
phoebemoon: Hiiihiiii! Thanks!  
teesachan: It will be called "Libera me - lemon". I don't know how sour it will be yet ;) **blushes** It's still in the  
writing!  
Noa: Making Rin hate Fluffy? Hmmmm... **ponders** As for possession, Fluffy's a youkai and I think his way of thinking  
goes like that, especially in this situation. And yes, kinky sex in the rival's house ;) **snickers** Kinda blows up  
his ego, no? And also... well, you'll understand! ^_^  
Ayame-fataru: Oooh yes, Sesshoumaru bees a angry doggie sometimes... ^_^_  
Dark flame: Don't worry, no rape in this story!!  
Ano Onna Oji: http://krangnes.com/temp/hatsuiroast.jpg ^_^ Hope ya like! Hatsui walking in on them? ROFL!!!! **snickers**  
Rest: THANK YOU! :D  
  
  
Disclaimer: Sesshoumaru, Rin and Jaken belongs to Rumiko Takahasi, please don't sue me.  
  
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Normally she had nightmares about her family dying again and again as they were killed infront of her.   
It almost felt real, and she swore she could still smell the blood. Or about the days when she was back   
in the village, alone and beaten by the men, about the wolves who had killed her, their jaws biting into   
her flesh as she screamed. But somehow this nightmare was worse, though she didn't know why as she tossed   
and turned in her sleep.  
  
**Dream sequence**  
She saw him standing there, his trademark aloof expression on his elegant face. He was watching her,  
and she watched him back, golden eyes meeting brown ones.  
Feeling something was wrong, she took a step forward, her small hand shaking as she reached for him.  
But he didn't move.  
So she took another step, and another one, and another one.  
Why wasn't she getting closer to him?  
The darkness was increasing, and she felt herself growing colder. she called out for him, begging him  
to come to her, but she couldn't hear herself. Could he?  
Then she felt her heart skip a beat as he slowly turned around, his long hair whipping as he strode  
off, the distance between them increasing.  
"SESSHOUMARU-SAMA!"  
Why was he leaving her?! After... he... why?! Why had he done it if he wanted to leave her?!  
Rin scrambled after him as fast as her legs would allow her, fear numbing her senses.  
**End of dream sequence**  
  
Gasping for breath after sitting up with a jerk, Rin stared right infront of her, eyes wide.  
The reason she had been cold was because she had kicked the covers off her she realized, wiping  
the sweat off her forehead. It was just a dream, another bad one.  
sighing out of relief, she let herself fall back on the futon, spreading her arms.  
As she felt her right hand hit something soft, she blinked and turned her head to see what it was.  
Upon seeing a small and crumbled blue flower lying there, her eyes went wide.  
Not able to stop her small hand from quivering, she picked it up, staring in disbelief at it.  
She blinked. It was still there...  
So the events last night weren't a part of her dream after all...? Rin winced, feeling the  
slight pain in her back and the soreness between her legs. It... had happened.  
Quickly and getting out of bed faster than most teenagers used to, Rin ran for the door,  
not bothering to change into her daykimono.  
  
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It was still early outside as Rin ran over the fields, looking around in panic. The singing of the  
birds didn't reach her ears, nor did her own breath. The fact that she almost stumbled in several rocks,  
sticks and branches didn't slow her down at all, she kept on running, ignoring the fact that her legs  
were screaming out in protest from this abuse.  
However, as she found what she had been searching for, her pace slowing down to a halt, her eyes never  
leaving the figure that stood there in the grass merely 50 yards away from her next to the lazy river.  
The wind swept by, ruffling her uncombed hair, rushing past her and played with Sesshoumaru's  
long silvery strands, stirring his fluffy tail along with it. Neither flinched however as they  
both watched eachother intently.  
  
Then Rin smiled a little, starting to walk over to him.  
But after a couple of steps her legs froze, and her smile dropped as she looked over her shoulder.  
Hatsui... she couldn't leave him like this... not without saying goodbye...  
Her heart felt like it was breaking into two pieces. Who of the two should she chose?  
Looking horrified at Sesshouamru, she found his expression to be as blank as usual, eyes  
cold as they watched her. No matter how hard she tried, she knew she could look at him until Doomsday  
and never find a sincere emotion on the mask that was actually his face.  
Why had he sought her out last night, leaving the blue flower there?  
Several questions raced around in her head, and she felt her breath getting caught in her throat.  
Did he... was... was it his way of saying goodbye?!  
"S-sesshoumaru-sama?" she asked meekly, taking another step towards him. Was he leaving her...?  
Or did he want her to leave him? Was this why he had ordered her to stay her? Was this all his doing  
to get rid of her after all these years...?  
No, he cared! He had to! Otherwise he wouldn't have come to her during the night, kissed her forehead  
or tucked her in, touching her like he had done. He wouldn't have left the flower, and he wouldn't be   
standing there, looking at her with those golden eyes of his!  
She couldn't leave him like this, he was her master! She owed him her life, and she needed him!  
Feeling her eyes burn she raised her hands to her mouth, desperately trying to calm down her breathing.  
How could she possibly leave *him*?! Her Sesshoumaru-sama, the tall beautiful youkai who had given her  
life when she was supposed to have death, the lord who protected her and let her sleep safe next to  
him during the cold nights. She loved him, she knew that, and for her entire life with him she had  
cherished every smile he had given her, adored his looks, his strength and the occassional attention  
he gave her. But she had also known, though she had done her best to deny it, that he was a youkai.  
A mighty youkai who hated humans. He had slaughtered them, killed them in cold blood and with no  
remorse at all.  
So how could he possibly love one?  
Once again she looked over her shoulder, her eyes towards the rooftops she saw there in the distance.  
She was human... they were human... Hatsui was human... Hatsui cared for her... and...  
Overwhelmed at all these new thoughts and impressions, Rin dropped her head, her hands balled up  
into fists as she clenched her eyes shut and tried to calm her breathing.  
  
When she raised her head to look into his calm golden ones, she felt tears run down her cheeks, her  
throat burning as she croaked out hoarsely.  
"I... f-forgive me... Sesshoumaru-sama..."  
When she didn't see any reaction on his face, Rin clenched her jaw tight to prevent more tears from  
coming, then she turned, she couldn't look at him again, for if she did, she didn't know what she would do.  
"... I will miss you... thank you... for everything..."  
If he for once responded, she didn't hear it nor want to as she started half running back towards with a   
painful expression on her face, tears staining her face and sobs making their way past her lips.  
  
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The steps he took when he turned around and started on the walk back towards the dark forest proved to be   
more difficult than he had imagined. He thought that he, Sesshoumaru, was easily prepared for the sight of   
her when she turned around and headed back towards the village as he knew she would do, but when it actually   
happened, he was surprised at the feeling in the pit of his stomach. Standing still, concealed in the shady   
light of the forest he looked over his shoulder once again, casting a last glance towards the village.  
This was for the better, he chided himself. This was what he had promised himself all those years ago.  
Save the girl, then allow her to follow him until someone else took care of her.  
After all, she was a human and belonged with her own kin. A low, annoying and worthless being who reeked,   
was weakwilled, couldn't fight, blabbered annoyingly, clung to him... smelled of flowers, had big eyes that...  
He snorted a little, quickening his pace and clenched his jaw, eyes gleaming with determination.  
He, the great Sesshoumaru, lord of the west, son of Inutaisho was not upset! Of course he wasn't upset about  
Rin staying with the human male! This was how things were supposed to be! Humans mated with humans, period.  
Besides, now he didn't have to watch her have pups of her own, grow older, age and die...  
Now that she had a mate that would take care of her, he wouldn't have to come back to check on her.   
Practical.  
Suddenly he felt his eyes sting for a moment. Had he gotten something in his eye? He raised a hand to his   
eyes, then blinked as he felt some moisture on his fingers, startling him and catching him by surprise.   
His pace slowed down until he stopped, standing still. What was this?! As he tried to take a deep breath,   
he found it rather difficult to breathe through his nose for a peculiar reason, and what was that   
uncomfortable feeling in his chest? Had he fallen ill?  
He held his breath for a moment, feeling more moisture seep out of his eyes, making his marked cheeks   
slightly wet. WHAT was going on?!  
  
He calmly walked over to the river, watching his own reflection in the calm water. Why were his eyes red?   
He wasn't furious nor transforming? Seeing himself raise a hand to touch his wet cheeks, Sesshoumaru frowned   
as he realized what was happening. This... feeling, he hadn't experienced it since the day his mother died  
when he was but a pup... the only time he could remember this... sickening feeling. This feeling was for weaklings!  
With a fierce growl he lashed out at the offending reflection, making the water ripple as he hurriedly rose   
to his feet and marched in a determined manner back towards where Jaken was waiting.  
He was not crying! Someone of his status never did!  
So he wiped his eyes some more, not looking back towards the village where he had left Rin... his pup.  
Now that she was gone, the memories and forbidden images would disappear.  
He was free. They both were.  
  
~THE END~  
  
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A/N: Ok, I have to admit, I did sniffle and feel a few tears wanting to make an appearance... but everything in  
me wanted it to end this way! **ducks incase any angry boots come flying**  
Think about it: they are different races, Sesshoumaru has his attitude and reputation after all, Rin being human,  
the fact that he can't give her what she wants... I just don't think that they can have a merrily after.  
I have only read a few stories with a non-happy ending on this subject, and I wanted to write one the way  
I see their relationship going...  
  
**pulls out hankie and blows her nose, then wipes her eyes** Yes, I admit it, I cry easily, I bawled my eyes  
out when watching Fushigi Yuuhi... ~.~,  
  
At least you have the lemon left to look forward to!! A romantic moment between Sesshoumaru and Rin! 


End file.
